After I Left (Day 215)

One week after 

I left, I lay down

on the floor 

on a borrowed futon cushion 

in my new apartment 

in a building that used 

   to be a paper factory 

there were no sheets on my bed

there were no dishes in the kitchen 

there were no curtains on the windows

there were no books on the shelves 

there were no shelves 

there were no lamps

what was there 

was a blue candle 

   with three wicks

   in a wide-mouthed jar 

and a goldfish named Cal, 

   because I loved Cal Ripken,

   baseball hero with eyes like ice

   and a whole lotta heart  

that night, 

after work

after running up 

   the building’s stairs

after blowing out 

   each wick, I lay 

on the floor 

in the dark

and when the demons arrived, 

as expected, right on time,

I closed my eyes 

and listened 

to Cal, sorting through 

the gravel in his bowl, 

sucking up each pebble 

and spitting it out

plink…plink…plink 

and was glad for the company

(c) 2017, by Hannah Six

Image: Bowl of Goldfish, by Childe Hassam, 1912